No Big Deal
by Dude13
Summary: While on a date, Frankie and her newest boyfriend discover that they have vastly differing opinions about what poses the biggest threat to the relationship. Oneshot.


(**Author's Warnin****g**: _Like everything else, this takes place in my series, set up by the events in my first story "More Than My Friend" where the big event is that Frankie adopts Mac. If you haven't read that story yet, I strongly suggest you do so now, or else you might get terribly confused_.)

"….Frankie, I…I-I'm sorry, but…well, I…see, it's j-just…I'm sorry, but I just gotta come clean here; I-I…I haven't been…t-totally honest with you."

As soon as the lanky redheaded young woman heard these fateful words, she was honestly taken so off guard, she choked a little on slice of chocolate cake that she had been enjoying. After nearly coughing the mouthful of desert back up onto the table, she barely managed to swallow down before she gasped hoarsely, "_What_?"

The hazelnut-haired young man sitting directly across from her in the small restaurant grimaced miserably, and started anxiously fidgeting with his napkin as he unhappily continued. "I-I'm sorry Frankie, really, it's just…well, like I said, I've just been hiding this way too long, and-"

Frances "Frankie" Foster was aghast, to say they very least. After all, she had been dating the fellow since her friend Kathy and set them up for a little over a month now, and so far, things had been perfect. Well, perfect when compared to her past track record of dating; the simple fact they had been going out for this long alone made this all seem like a dream come true.

Needless to say, Frankie was not at all pleased with this bombshell, and before he could say another word, she suddenly sputtered in flat-out denial, "No, you haven't."

"What?" he replied as he shot her a curious look. "Yes, yes I have! I'm sorry Frankie, but I _have_ been keeping this from you, and I seriously can't-"

"No, you haven't!" Frankie desperately whined again, as if that would make everything right.. "No, no! Rudy, I…I-I thought that we agreed to be totally honest with each other before we started-"

"And I'm sorry, but I haven't!" Rudy confessed, looking as guilty as could be. "I'm sorry Frankie, I really am! I never should have tried to cover this up for so long, but…I…I j-just….look, you see-"

At this point, the redhead's jade eyes had widened to the size of ripe oranges in her dismay as she moaned, "Oh…_please_ don't tell me that-"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" the flustered young man groaned as he banged his head on the table. "Honest, if there was an easier way of telling you this, I already would've-"

"The whole thing with Mac _does_ weird you out too much…doesn't it?" Frankie whimpered, fearing the absolute worst as her stomach started clenching painfully tightly in the anxiety attack that had quickly overtaken her.

Rudy jerked his head back up in an flash to gawk at her in genuine puzzlement. "Wait, wait, hold on! What?"

"It _does_!" she lamented miserably as she misread his facial expression. "Oh my God, it _does_! I should've known it! It freaks out _everyone_, _every_ time!"

"_What_?" Rudy grunted, with mouth agape in bewilderment. "Oh no, Frankie, no! No, no, no! I don't-"

Unfortunately, Frankie had already convinced herself that her worst nightmare had just come alive as she buried her face in her hands with a jangle of hoop bracelets. "I _know_ it's weird that I'm raising a kid already, but I _thought_ this was clear already; Mac _wasn't_ forced upon me, _I_ decided to adopt him, and-"

"But-" the young man sputtered as he tried in vain to interrupt her.

"Look, if you seriously have a problem with that, I'm sorry, I _can't_ change it!" she removed her face from her hands to actually snarl at him. "Well…I mean, I could probably if I wanted to…but I _won't_. When I say he's family, I _mean_ it, and I _won't_ drag him back to the orphanage just for another date! You got that? I mean, why this isn't clear to you yet, then I have no idea-"

"Frankie, that's not with this is about at all!" Rudy involuntarily yelped, and managed to startle a few other patrons of the tiny Italian restaurant in the process.

For the second time in just a manner of minutes, Frankie found herself utterly dumbfounded. In a heartbeat, her anger and despair vanished into thin air while her snarl disappeared to make room for a blank look of utter befuddlement. "…._Huh_?"

He just gawked right back at her in shock, as if she was out of her mind. "….What was _that_ all about? You…you just…I mean, jeez! You almost fell entirely to pieces because-"

"I…I-I…" the badly confused young woman began stammering as she hastily began to try and recollect herself, all the while hoping she didn't just make too much of a scene. As her pale peach-toned skin started to glow brightly with a vibrant blush, she bit down on her lower lip before whimpering, "I….I thought that…well, I told you about what happened to the last few guys I dated, and-"

"What?" he interrupted in appall. "Wait…wait, you didn't _actually_ think that-"

"Well…" Frankie murmured as she embarrassedly averted her gaze. "I-"

"Oh, _no_!" Rudy moaned as he slapped his forehead. "No, no! Frankie, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to imply that at _all_! Honest to God, I have _nothing_ against Mac. I'm serious here, he's a great kid, and I…well, I knew about your situation _before_ we started going out, remember? We first met because I was sent to your house as part of that social services investigation, and-"

"So _what's_ the problem then?" she whined while gazing pleadingly into his eyes.

"I…I-I…" he began stammering again as he tried to touch upon an obviously unpleasant subject. "See, I…I have a…a girlfriend, who…wait, wait, _ackpth_! _Ex_-girlfriend! I mean _ex_-girlfriend! Well, she's _supposed_ to be just an ex…at least, that's the way it should be, but…I dunno, maybe it'd be best if we called her a tiny bit obsessive, or…"

Suddenly, he banged his head on the table again with a moan of despair. "Who am I kidding? Frankie, she's absolutely crazy, and because of her, I-"

He suddenly silenced himself in mid-lament as he heard a most peculiar noise. At first, he didn't think he could believe his own ears, but when he looked up again, lo and behold, Frankie was chuckling weakly in what could be nothing else but heart-felt relief.

"…That…that's it?" she chortled. "An ex? That's all?"

His eyeballs almost bugged out of their sockets in his massive disbelief. "'That's it'? What do you _mean_ 'that's it?' Frankie-"

Despite his attempts to convince her that they had a real obstacle on their hands, as far as Frankie appeared to be concerned, everything appeared to be absolutely peachy. Grinning toothily in genuine joy, she just admonished lightly with a giggle, "Rudy, don't do that again, all right? You had me pretty freaked there…honestly, you have no idea how glad I am to hear that-"

"Glad?" he repeated, unable to believe any of this; she was neither upset, nor ripping into him for hiding this from her. "Frankie how….h-how are you…I….I don't get it! This isn't anything to be glad about! I'm telling you, this girl is legitimately out of her mind! She'll…she'll…oh my God, you _don't_ understand! When I mean crazy, I _mean_ crazy! Seriously, _she_ was the one who originally dumped me, but….look, I don't know why she changed her mind, but ever since she suddenly wanted to get back together, she's been relentless, Frankie! Relentless! You think you know what possessiveness is? Not until you've met her, you haven't! I mean, I-I haven't had anything close to a real girlfriend since because of her, and you know why? _She_ scares them away! No joke, she actually frightens every one of them off because she's still convinced that we have a chance of getting back together, and she just creeps the living daylights out of…oh, jeez, I'm so sorry I didn't tell you about Barbara sooner! I'm sorry, it's just that things were going so well at first, and…and I didn't want to…I-I didn't want to mess up, and…I'm so sorry that-"

The shrill chime of a cell phone abruptly interrupted the woeful young man's frantic lament. After digging her phone out of her purse, Frankie checked the number, and calmly held up her hand to motion for her boyfriend to be silent, like a parent would gesture to a noisy toddler.

"Sorry, just gimme a sec to take this." She murmured calmly, to his astonishment.

"_What_? Frankie, are you listening to me at _all_? I-"

"Hello?" Frankie answered the call, and broke out grinning once she heard the familiar voice through the receiver. "Oh, hey pal! How are you? Uh-huh….uh-huh….yeah, actually we should be leaving soon, so I'll probably be back home in…wait, what? Should you tell Grandma about _what_ now? Mac, wait….wait, hold on, just hold on, pal, just slow down, and…what do you _mean_ some blonde girl is outside? Can't she read the sigh outside? We don't do adoptions this late, we….wait, she's _doing_ what now?"

Looking quite confused, Frankie just stared blankly at her phone for a moment then announced to Rudy, "Um…Mac says…uh…he says that some blonde is at the house demanding to see you…or me…so, uh…do you know what-"

As soon as she said this, in a flash he paled to the color of bleached flour in horror, as his eyes nearly bugged to the size f saucers. "Oh…oh my God, it's…it's beginning…"

"Huh?" the puzzled redhead inquired. "What's beginning? Rudy, what's going on?"

"Frankie, don't you get it at all? It's her! It's _her_!" he gasped while his heart rate tripled in his skyrocketing panic. "She…she's actually…oh my God, see, _this_ is what I meant! _This_ is what she does! As soon as she finds out I'm seeing anyone, it's like having your own stalker! She'll just pop up and try to…t-to…I'm sorry, I'm so sorry! I knew I should've told you sooner! It's just like with the last two girls I tried to date! She'll try and tell you off, and keep doing it until you're so creeped out, you-"

"Oh! You mean this is the ex?" Frankie asked much too calmly then he would've expected in his wildest dreams.

"_What_ does it sound like?" he snapped. "She'll-"

To his indescribable surprise, Frankie actually burst out _smiling_ as she chirped happily, "Great! Now we can get this all over with!"

"G-get…get this all over with?" he repeated incredulously. "What's that supposed to mean? Frankie, you don't understand, Barbara is-"

"I'm supposed to be intimidated by another girl? Pfft!" Frankie scoffed. "In case you forgot, you're talking to someone who grew up with a cage full of extreme-o-saurs in their backyard. Trust me, I don't get fazed all that easily."

"But…b-but-"

She promptly gestured for him to be quiet as she finished her conversation with Mac. "Don't worry about it, pal, I'll take care of it…uh-huh….uh-huh….yup, we'll be home in just a jiffy…yeah, don't mind her, it's all right…okay, love you, pal….bye!"

With this, Frankie hung up, and got out of her seat. "I gotta use the bathroom quickly before we go. You'll take care of the bill, right?"

"I-I….I-I-I…I…uh…I-I…I…" Rudy just stammered stupidly while he floundered in an ocean confusion as she trotted off. Just as she slipped off into the women's restroom though, he nearly spooked half the restaurant-goers out of their skins when he cried hoarsely, "_How is this not bothering you at all_?"

* * *

"…Rudy? Rudy?" the twiggy young woman called out for possibly the hundredth time as she paced back and forth on the front porch of the large Victorian mansion. "Rudy!"

"For the _last_ time!" a little boy groaned exasperatedly as he stood in the open doorway, with his curious imaginary friend by his side. "He's _not_ here!"

The woman's straw-blonde hair whipped about as she swiveled her head and fixed her sharp blue eyes upon Mac in a fierce glare. "Nuh-uh-uh! Don't you dare lie to me! I _know_ he's hanging out with that redheaded hussy these days. I know it! I saw them together downtown yesterday, and I've seen her in the commercials for this place, and-"

"So just_ what _are you doing?" Mac demanded boldly, though only a moment later he was cringing as the blonde hissed at him like a cobra preparing to strike.

"I don't know what you're trying to do, kid, but you better knock it off, or I swear, I'll-"

"Hey, leave Mac alone!" Bloo tried to speak up. "He's not the one who's totally whacko here-"

"Crazy?" she snarled. "What's crazy is if I let some skank from a shelter for imaginary friends take _my_ man away from me, and I'm not about to let some no-good-"

"Oh, Christ Barbara, leave them _alone_!" someone cried out. Immediately, the others turned their heads and looked to the couple clambering out of the car that had just parked next to the curb.

The instant she saw her ex, the possessive blonde broke out smiling with glee like a child on Christmas morning. "Rudy-pie! _There_ are you are! I thought that you were with…oh…oh, _now_ I see!"

Once she laid eyes on the redhead stepping out of the small sedan, she curled her lips into a ferocious scowl. As soon as Rudy noticed this, he stifled a small yelp before he started whispering frantically to Frankie, "Okay, just….j-just go get Mac and Bloo, and get them inside…I-I'll try to talk to her, just…j-just don't look her in the eyes, or-"

As his tone quavered uncontrollably, Frankie meanwhile was quite the stark contrast as she hastily sized up her twiggy opponent, and immediately broke out into a confident smirk. "_That's_ seriously who I'm supposed to be scared off?"

"My total psycho ex?" her boyfriend shot back incredulously. "Yes, that's _exactly_ what we have to deal with!" the young man whined. "Frankie, please, just….j-just try and ignore whatever she screams at you, and don't-"

Despite his frantic warnings, the redhead merely cracked her fingers with a grin and a chortle. "Oh, _please_; I've dealt with _much_ worse than this. I mean, I have to deal with Bloo on a daily basis, for crying out loud."

"_What_?" he cried out as she started boldly strolling up the front walk. "Wait, wait, wait! Frankie, what do you think you're-"

"Don't worry, I can handle this." She just reassured calmly without so much as a pause in her step.

"No, seriously, you have _no_ idea!" the panicking young man following at her heels tried to argue as he gestured frantically. "She-"

"I can handle this, okay?" Frankie only repeated coolly as the twiggy blonde crossed her arms, tapped her foot and gave the redhead a fierce glower that could almost kill.

"Okay!" she snarled as she jabbed a finger. "I want you listen up, and you better listen good! I've heard you've been running around with _my_ Rudy for the past few weeks, and if you think for a moment you're going to steal him away out from under my nose, then you have another coming, got it? I'll…uh..."

She rapidly trailed off in mid-threat once she saw that Frankie was actually beaming from ear to ear. In an instant, the blonde was paralyzed with sheer confusion the likes of which were behind description, and for a few moments she just gawked stupidly.

"Hi! Barbara, right?" Frankie greeted warmly as she approached, as Rudy kept a wary eye on his ex as he continued to trail along.

"Careful, she'll-" he tried to whisper.

The redhead however continued to disregard his pleas as she trotted right by Barbara and up the porch stairs, where she calmly lifted Mac up off his feet and safely onto her shoulders, and herded Bloo behind her, while her deceptively friendly grin never vanished for an instant.

"…Frankie?" her extremely perplexed charge whimpered as he held on tightly.

"Hold on, kiddo, I just gotta take care of something." She replied with a reassuring pat before asking the blonde again, "Now then…you _are_ Barbara, right? Rudy's old girlfriend?"

With this, Barbara seemed to snap out of her shock as she narrowed her eyes fiercely at the inexplicably joyful redhead. "_Current_." She corrected naively. "We're just having some relationship trouble-"

"No, we're _not_!" her ex snapped from a safe distance. "We don't even have a relationship anymore! We're broken up! Don't you get it? It's _over_! You can't-"

"_Just_ a little bit of trouble." She repeated as she ignored the young man. "And for your information, I _don't_ appreciate you -_YEEEEEEEEEEEEEK_!"

Moving faster than the human eye could follow, Frankie swiftly pinched the unsuspecting girl by the ear, and without a word of warning began twisting her hand slowly. Instantly, the startled blonde burst out shrieking shrilly in agony.

"_Ow_! _Ow_! _Ow_!" she screamed as she started waving her arms wildly. "What the hell are you d-_OWWWWW_!"

Her captor didn't even blink as she began twisting harder, practically doubling the torment with just a flick of the wrist. Barely able to stand it, the blonde dropped to her knees as she continued screeching like a cat whose tail was being yanked.

"Now, I only have three simple rules you need to follow for us to get along just fine." Frankie said frighteningly calmly as she leaned in close. "One; don't mess with my boyfriend. Two; don't mess with me. And three; _don't_ even think about even thinking about messing with my family, like what you were trying to get away with just now. Kapeesh?"

"_OW_! _OW_! Y-yes! Yes!" came the pitiful yowl. "_Yes_!"

"Are you going to pop in for more visits like this anytime soon? Or would you prefer to talk about this some more?" Frankie asked with a tug, and her prisoner immediately tried shaking her head as best as she could as her eyes welled up with hot tears.

"No! I-I promise! I promise! _OW_! _OWWW_! I _said_ I promise! I promise!"

"Thank you." The redhead whispered with a nod of satisfaction. She finally released her tenacious hold, and in a flash, the blonde was clumsily retreating out the front gates, holding her aching ear and shrieking to the high heavens as she tried to get away as fast as humanly possible.

At first, Rudy could only stand as still as a statue, with jaw dangling agape as he was frozen with tremendous shock. He may have even stood there all night in his stunned stupor if Frankie hadn't strolled up to him and chuckled, "There! I wished you told me sooner; now _that_ wasn't so hard, was it?"

"I…I-I…I…" he just started stuttering like a nitwit.

"You still have my leftovers from dinner, right?" she asked calmly while basking in her smashing victory.

"Uh…s-sure…here…" he murmured as he obediently handed her a doggy bag, which she promptly handed up to Mac where he still sat perched on her shoulders.

"Got some goodies for you, pal." She announced, as the totally mystified little boy grabbed the bag with a bemused nod.

"Um…thanks, Frankie…" he murmured softly.

"No probs." She laughed before looking back to the dumbfounded young man. "I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

"Y-yeah…" he grunted as she leaned over to give him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Great!" she chuckled. "Thanks so much for dinner!"

"Uh…no problem…g'night Frankie…g'night Mac…" he muttered softly.

"Good night!" the jubilant redhead bade him warmly before twirling around and strolling back up to the front doors of Foster's, while carrying her still flummoxed charge.

"…What…was _that_?" Mac whimpered.

Frankie just giggled in relief as they exited into the house. "It was a heck of a lot easier than dealing with the rabbit, I'll tell you that much, pal…"

In a moment they disappeared form sight, thus leaving one profoundly astonished young man still standing at the foot of the porch steps, staring unblinkingly into empty space as he practically resembled a wax statue someone had carelessly left outside all alone.

Well, almost alone. After his creator and Foster's resident caretaker went inside, Bloo wordlessly hopped down to the front walk, approached the stunned fellow, and tugged sharply on his pant leg.

"Wow…she _totally_ wears the pants in this relationship, doesn't she?" the azure figment inquired curiously.

Finally, he showed signs of life as a weak grin flittered across his face while he glanced down at the curious imaginary friend. "Maybe…but as long as she can do stuff like _that_….then to be honest, I don't think I want it any other way."

**The End **


End file.
